wordless

i guess this is something i've been thinking about for a while, amidst the backsliding of my physics marks (from the practice papers: from 90-ish at mid years to hovering around 80 now).

recently when finding some spare time i've read some of this book - "the race" by the bishop, dr. robert solomon. one of the images that the book painted in my mind, though somewhat cliched, is the idea of a guy climbing a ladder all through his life, only realising at the top that he'd climbed the wrong ladder, largely misguided by others around who cheered him on (probably symbolic of society in general). hence, what the book says (and what we can infer from this) is that we should be careful that we don't merely go where society wants us to go, but rather follow what we value, whether for christians this be following God, or for non-christians perhaps something else like inner peace, an ethical life, etc.

i find that in many ways i'm pushing upwards along a ladder, both in the way i do things as well as in the way i tend to neglect some other things. there've been many things external to schoolwork that i've wanted to do, yet not really considered as they're blocked out by the volume of schoolwork in the foreground. schoolwork in the sense of not only academics but also CCA related work and all. i want to spend more time with my friends, especially some of those i haven't talked to in a while, re-learn piano and guitar, finish scripting a touhou game, et cetera. the list goes on and on...

im not sure how i'll do it. even the holidays / post exam period don't look very appealing, with cas documentation, ee and what other random stuff it might bring.

then again even if i'm generally focusing on the ladder, i know i'm not climbing it properly. the physics paper i did today, or rather yesterday night, made me really unhappy:

Q12 Suppose you have a ball that rolls off a table horizontally at velocity of v. It hits the ground t seconds later at a horizontal distance x from the table. then, you have a heavier ball roll off the same table at the same velocity v. (Take air resistance to be negligible)

a) it hits the ground t seconds later, x from table
b) it hits the ground t seconds later but less than x from table
c) it hits the ground x from table but less than t seconds later
d) it hits the ground less than t seconds later and less than x from table.

i chose b. i feel *very* stupid now. (answer is a. time is same because the acceleration of free-fall, g = 9.80655ish ms^-2 is independent of mass. and then, think of it in the sense of projectile motion - horizontal velocity is equal to v in both cases, so if the ball can travel for the same time, then x must be the same.)

its not just physics. the other subjects are falling backwards as well. exams are starting in 2 days, and i haven't even done a thing for comp science! =x

but worse than that, in other, more important areas, i'm beginning to falter, if i haven't already been doing so. relationships, lateral and vertical, but most importantly, vertical......

was it something i said
or something i never did,
or was i always in the way?